Since I returned from my Endless Summer , or rather six week surf adventure in Wales, I have found it difficult to write anything. How do I put into words the seemingly endless weeks of unplugging from normal life and living in a tent, in a field, next to the gorgeous Rhossili Bay, surfing up to three times a day and watching countless sunest?
How do I explain the simple pleasures and slower pace of life I experienced which when written down seem completely trivial and insignificant to other people? How do I write about the feeling of walking on grass in bare feet every day, about not looking in a mirror and how that made me feel a sense of freedom I’d never had, about sitting quietly outside my tent starring at the night sky with no noise in my head, about the smell of bbq’s and haze from the smoky fires in the sunset?
How do I write about how I felt at home in a place I’ve never lived, about surfing at sunset alone, with the red sky on fire (see cover photo), about the quiet letting go of nonsense and noise from my normal life, about becoming less wasteful and more resourceful, about how days felt like weeks as I got up with the sun, slept with the darkness and made the most of the in between? How do I write about the strong, amazing, women I spent time with , who lit the path for me like the stars that they are, about the revolving door of rather handsome neighbours I had who each taught me something about myself?
I drove away from Gower at the end of summer with tears streaming down my face . I could barely mumble a goodbye to Welsh Surf Bird for the lump in my throat. It felt like my heart was trying to escape out of my throat and stay there in Llangennith, like a dog who doesn’t want to leave the park. I was scared of losing how I felt that summer but, with four hours drive home I had plenty of time to think about how I was going to deal with this.
I stopped off an hour into my journey in Abergavenny to say goodbye to Ozzi, another of the Welsh birds and when I pulled away from her house I knew a decision had been made without me realising. It wouldn’t be easy and could take a while to orchestrate properly. Although the thought of leaving my friends and the familiarity of 23 years in my adopted home city scared me, looking back at the number of visitors I had over my six weeks away, I knew that distance would be no obstacle to those very long and strong friendships. Surf Bloke had been up and down like a yo-yo from Lancashire all summer and my surf brainwashing had finally taken a hold of Long Legs who had visited twice and bought himself a wetsuit .
There was nothing I could do but, move there as soon as I could, somehow.
What a lovely post and so beautifully written. That last part really resonates with how I felt last August..driving away from Cornwall, stopping at the services and bursting into tears. It was like a homesickness for a place which wasn’t home by name but felt like it in my heart. I can’t wait to read part 2! Xxx
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Thanks for your lovely comment Kernow. Seeing you go through the same excitement and terror has reassured me that everything will be ok and my new home will be the place of many an exciting adventure x
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