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It’s My 40th Birthday

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Age is only important if you are a cheese or a wine

For dramatic effect play the music video below whilst reading

I woke up 40 years old a week ago today. 40? Yes, that’s 40. I can’t get my head around this. It’s half of 80 and twice 20. No, it doesn’t matter how I put it I don’t believe it. I looked in the mirror that morning and I still saw a young girl. My morning creaks and groans and my hangover told a different story which I chose to ignore.

After my run and watching the sunrise at Corralejo I came back to change and as I pulled on my pink vans, some board shorts and faith no more T shirt I did wonder, am I one of those old people trying to cling onto youth and looking really, really sad? Should I really have more hoodies in my wardrobe than actual tops and more trainers than real shoes? Should I be skating around in band t shirts and having girl crushes on rock singers? Should I be rocking up at surf school, old enough to be most of the other student’s mother? Well the answer is obvious isn’t it? Of course blimping well I should!

There is a silent, stealthy, subconscious fear of 40 that creeps up when you are not looking, I didn’t even realise I had it until about a week before and it disappeared the minute I became 40 when I woke up and everything was the same.  It wasn’t a fear of the aging itself, I have never had a banging body to lose and I have really enjoyed the growth in my self confidence as each year passes. It was more a melancholic reflection of my first 40 years, a half way review of everything negative I could possibly think of. What I didn’t do, why didn’t I, what ifs, time I wasted, opportunities I didn’t take, loves lost, stupid mistakes I made, allowing things that had passed to hold me back and whatever other dramatic laments you can think of.

On the day of my birthday I managed a short surf despite my shoulder injury and what it did was remind me of my why and renew my energy and determination to get fit again following this injury. I’m sure 20 year old me would have been shocked but proud of 40 year old me surfing on my birthday! I wish I had found this passion for surfing and running earlier in life but, it wasn’t meant to be. It feels that this is my time and I’m excited about entering my 40’s. I’m going to make the most of every opportunity I can because I know in the blink of an eye I’ll be celebrating 50, then 60. I want to look back over those decades and be counting the positives. If there’s one thing I have learnt in the past 18 months it’s to be an enthusiast for something that makes you delirious with happiness. If you find that you will always have a focus, a source of joy and a reason why. You will always find good company and you will always be young at heart.

Welcome to Surfabella , Antics of a 40 Something Surfer

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I’m Clare and I’m an addict. A surf addict*

One day I was an ordinary, rotund,  38 year old,  morbidly obese (BMI 41 so yes, really) lazy lass. I was bumbling along with a pint in one hand and a cig in the other. I had fun, went to lots of gigs, had friends, met  new people and travelled a bit. But, something was amiss. I felt pretty crap about myself and had no real  interests other than going to the pub which in turn was adding to my weight and to my lack of purpose and direction. Had I let my best years go to waste? Was I over the hill? What was my purpose in life? Dramatic? Me? OK, maybe a little.

In  February 2013 it all changed when I took a surf class on holiday and I caught a wave on my ample belly for the first time. From that moment on life was neber the same . I struggled to even lie on the board in my first  surf class and had no hope of getting up. I had an amazing, patient teacher who  kept telling me I could do it and for the first time in years I started to believe I could conquer something I was finding hard instead of saying ‘ I can’t’ and walking away and going home to cry.

Me and my teacher sat on the beach together after the surf lesson and I vowed to him I was going to learn to surf properly. I’d go home lose weight, get fit and clean up my act and come back. For the first time in years I actually believed the words that were coming out of my mouth. I had to learn how to surf.

Playa Blanca Fuerteventura February 2012

Playa Blanca Fuerteventura February 2013

First lesson February 2013

So, I went home and immediately took up a healthy diet. I joined a gym, started a running programme, lifted weights, took up Pilates and circuit training.  I tried everything. I knocked the booze on the head. I lost about 65 pound ( there’s still more to go but, I’m working on it) I completed  a half marathon just four months after talking up running and raised £500 for the Wave Project, I finally quit smoking and took up skateboarding again after 18 years of not being on a board. Every step of the way my motivation was surfing. I had finally found my why.

18 months of change

13 months of change Feb 2013 – March 2014

Today I have been surfing for about a year and a half. I say surfing, what I mean is trying to surf. It took me aorund 100 hours of lessons to stand up. I still cheer, woop and clap myself if I catch a tiny wave and don’t fall off. I look around to see who else is looking so they can clap me too. I’m like a giant neoprene clad toddler taking their first steps and looking for approval! I am not cool at all but, I am passionate. I have the sea and surf in my blood like a virus and when I can’t surf or be near the ocean I’m pining like a lovesick teenager.

So, this brings us to Surfabella.com and what it’s all about. During the last 18 months I have shared my story with friends both privately and through social media and to my surprise people started saying how I had inspired them.  I have helped a few people with encouragement and a little advice to take up running or try something new.The fact that before I was the person least likely to have done all of the things listed above made people think well, if Clare can do it so can I .

So, here is Surfabella. My blog. I finally started putting this together while I was off work recovering from a skateboarding injury.  I hope to entertain and inspire other people with the continuing stories of my capers in surfing, skateboarding, running and this latest daft quest to get a 6 pack for Christmas for my Morocco surf trip, don’t hold your breath on that one.

I really hope you enjoy reading Surfabella.

Mahalo. Clare xxx

*Being a surf addict is not to be confused with being good at surfing